Monday, November 22, 2010

A Conversation

Lord, I don’t like this place. I don’t like where I am. The worry of tomorrow is stealing the joy of today. How do I cope with this uncertainty? Will tomorrow destroy me?

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat[or drink], or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they?” (Matthew 6:25)

Lord, I will give myself over to your will. I will do what you ask. If I only knew what you were asking. Waiting is so hard. What am I waiting for? Where are you taking me? Will I know when you show me? Will I be able to see your will?

For I know well the plan I have in mind for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare, not for woe! Plans to give you a future full of hope. When you call me, when you go to pray to me, I will listen to you. When you look for me, you will find me. Yes, when you seek me with all your heart, you will find me with you, says the Lord. (Jeremiah 29:11-14)

Lord, I am praying. Find me Lord. Find me in this place. This journey is not easy. The road less traveled is scary. Send your peace to my heart. If I know you are here, then I can bear this storm. Because I know, Lord that you are “my shepherd; there is nothing I lack. In green pastures you let me graze; to safe waters you lead me; you restore my strength. You guide me along the right path for the sake of your name. Even when I walk through a dark valley, I fear no harm for you are at my side; your rod and staff give me courage.” (Psalm 23:1-4)

"Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

Lord, I here I am. Teach me to be meek and humble of heart. I trust you. I know I shouldn’t worry about tomorrow because you have told me “do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.”(Matthew 6:34) But what shall I do while I wait? What is my purpose here?

Shout joyfully to the Lord, all you lands; worship the Lord with cries of gladness; come before him with joyful song. Know that the Lord is God, our maker to whom we belong, whose people we are, God’s well-tended flock. Enter the temple gates with praise, its courts with thanksgiving. Give thanks to God, bless his name; good indeed is the Lord, whose love endures forever, whose faithfulness lasts through every age. (Psalm 100)

I have been having this conversation with God for a couple weeks now. We are facing some uncertainty that will require us to make some big decisions in the near future. But it’s not the big changes that are making me uncomfortable. It’s not knowing what those changes will be. I’m in a place of waiting and waiting is hard. I don’t even like to wait in line at the grocery. So waiting for God to show us the right path to take that will forever change our future is almost unbearable. But, in this conversation, God revealed to me something important. We are not made to worry. He will take care of us. He loves us more than we can understand. All the trials and triumphs in our path are there to mold us into the people he calls us to be. I shouldn’t worry while I wait. I should do the one thing that he created us to do. Worship.

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